Archives for July 2020

July 22, 2020 - No Comments!

Meet our future selves

Today at our 5th A-list session for our A-mazing leaders, entitled Aspiration, our Wisdom Queen, Tatiana, led us on a powerful visualization journey. We were transported to meet our future selves who told us what is the most important thing to pay attention to, in the next 20 years. Seeing and feeling the energy, the space and the place of where and who we subconsciously aspire to be in 20 years’ time. And learn to be NOW, who we aspire to be in 20 years' time.

It was truly A-mazing to really "SEE" us as us.

Most of our future selves, turned up to be our present selves, maybe just hidden away. It was fascinating and empowering to see that some of our A-mazing leaders are already living happily in their futures, whilst others are looking forward to the next 20 years’ journeys and what they will become. 

I wanted to capture the energy and the emotional journey that some so powerfully experienced. And some journeys were a lot more emotional than others. Travelling 20 years in 20 minutes. Discovering the nick names of our future selves given to us by the communities we will be living in. 

And writing our own stories:  Johnny being happy and content already, the Fighter celebrating all the massive achievements accomplished already, Boule d'Energie knowing she has all the energy to do what it takes, the Queen knowing she has the power to make it all happen, Living in the Present realizing the power of being present to what is and not worrying so much about the future, Sunny being a shiny positive force already, Saviour being on a mission to find and spread balance, Powerful Smile committing to not lose that smile as she gets older, Approachable committing to play this game with his wife and find a joint name for their life together, Yoga Lady finding the serenity and calmness she has been looking for, Wise Healer welcoming guests in her mountain retreat, Beautiful Soul writing her book that will touch other souls, Brave Kora seeing herself aging beautifully and never stop believing that the journey will be a great one 😉 and of course Wisdom Queen who will enchant all of us with her magic wisdom!

Tatiana taught us that our Thoughts are energy…as proven by recent science experiments.  So when we work on creating an image aligned with our values, aligning our thoughts with that image and feeling those thoughts and emotions in our body, we manifest the actions which are aligned to getting to that dream…and as if by magic, the Universe returns and reflects that energy back to us. The energy of Action and Re-action. 

Our present is very much influenced by our past. And in an equal measure, our present is also very much influenced by our ability to imagine the future. Imagining the future that we want to create and go about creating it already. 

Begin to look at yourself through the lens of your future self.  Asking myself “What would Beautiful Soul do?” She will write a book that will touch the souls of many more people. “What would Powerful Smile do?” She will keep her smile on, even when life gets difficult.  How would your future self see an opportunity in an adversity? And the truth is, she or he is already in you. Like Michelangelo said: “It is not carving the figure from the stone, it is freeing a figure from the stone.”

I recently came across a quote that really resonated with me and which fitted Tatiana’s session's theme today: "I don't have to change, I only have to remember who I really am!" Thank you for reminding us, our Wisdom Queen!

ADA, 18 July 2020

July 15, 2020 - No Comments!

Audacity – Dare to care and not care

During July 2020, here at Adaptaa, we have been exploring what it means to feel Confident. And what it means to feel Audacious, which is one step beyond confidence. It means taking risks, it means Dare TO Care, and knowing when to Dare AND Care and when to Dare and NOT care.  

Caring is a fundamental human skill, but if you don’t care enough about yourself, you cannot care about others. That’s the paradox of life. 

Confidence is NOT “They will like me.” Confidence is “I’ll be fine if they don’t.”

Humans are wired for social approval. We all like approval from others.  It’s OK to want approval, it’s called being human.  What’s NOT OK is NEEDING approval.  When you care so much about what other people think of you, what you're really saying is that “what you think of me, is more important than what I think of me”.

When you tell yourself that because others don't like you, it means there's something wrong with you, you give that person a lot more power than they deserve.  You need to learn that another person's opinion is just that - their opinion and that's all it is.  You must never give anybody that kind of power and control over you, because they will always have it. This is what I try to teach my kids, which is not an easy task, in the era of social approval and social acceptance measured by the number of likes on social media. 

There's a big difference between wanting approval and needing approval. When you need approval, it means you become powerless and ineffective when you don't get it.  You make other people's opinions more important thank yours.

As a coach to high achieving leaders, what I have noticed is that people who get the most approval in life are the ones who care the least about it.  They care most about staying congruent with their own values. And the ones who get the least external approval, are the ones who are always going after it. 

So if you want approval, you need to understand the paradox of life – when you stop needing the approval of others,  when you stop concerning yourself with what others think of you and start living in accordance with your own values and advance confidently in the direction of your own dreams,  you will meet success.

And what that means is that success is not something that you can get in life. Success is an inner process. Success is something that you bring to everything you do in your life. It isn't something you get out of what you do or what others think of you. And when you get that, and you learn how to make sense of your inner signals, then success will begin to chase you.  Simple and not easy. 

One of my favourite quotes is: “Success does not lead to happiness. Happiness leads to success.”

Some call synchronicity.  When you are aligned with your deepest values and have the audacity to live your life in full accordance with those values, some unexplainable coincidences happen and success will come into your life in amounts that you never dreamt of before. 

I am finishing off with the title of one my favourite Brene Brown’s books – live “Daring greatly! Have the courage to be vulnerable and transform the way you live, love, parent and lead.”

ADA, 14 July 2020

July 6, 2020 - No Comments!

A-list Community Audacity

During our last A-mazing leaders’ session, we talked about Audacity. The willingness to take risks to fulfil your dreams and your potential. 

And I did an audacious thing and leaned into my edge by showing up "unprepared" and not using my usual perfect slides.  Ready to listen and follow the energy in the room.  For those who don’t know me, preparation and planning are my superpowers, so not using them felt edgy.  And sharing my edginess with the group created some magic. 

Inessa, one of our audacious leaders, reminded me of Churchill ‘s quote "If you want me to speak for 2 hours, I'm ready now, if you want me to speak for 2 min, give me 2 weeks to prepare!"  I was ready for the challenge.  And ready to challenge our leaders to speak up and share audaciously, by stating I was going to be silent for 5 min. After what felt like an eternity to me, a wonderful collection of stories emerged as a result....Stories of courage, of vulnerability and necessity. Of dreams to make the world a better place. Starting with us.

We agreed to put courage over comfort and play big and "dream without limits".  Everyone virtually chose one of the 4 questions from my jar with magical questions:

  1. What would you do with your life if you had all the money you needed?
  2. What would you do if you had all the skills and knowledge you needed?
  3. What would you do if you knew you could not fail?
  4. What would you do if you had all the time you needed?

You see, we sometimes blame the lack of resources for our lack of resourcefulness. Or our unwillingness to take risks. You need to find the resourcefulness inside yourself to deal with the fear of or perceived lack of the resources you think you need (money, time, skills/knowledge and failure)!  If you have the resourcefulness, you will find the resources. 

Taking risks is not about being fearless or having no fear. It’s about acknowledging the fear and doing it anyway. It’s about knowing what you know and what you don’t know.  It’s about being open to people, open to ideas, and the chances you take to make your vision and dreams a reality.   

My biggest insight from the session? All of us found it easier to be courageous in our youth, as audacious Kora reminded us! When we had much less to lose. We had no fear of losing the money, the status or the recognition we didn’t yet have! Anything that you are not willing to lose, it has power over you.  The only real freedom is freedom from fear.

What is your fear? And what would you do if you could own that fear? As Tatiana told us “Fear is a gift. It’s telling us when we need to act or which way we need to go”.  

To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.  Let yourself be seen and be audacious. As Carmen told us, “let yourself go and flow with the river of life”.

ADA, 4 July 2020